Always the Bridesmaid...

Yesterday Liz ( a girl I work with in my office ) approached me about considering writing a letter of recommendation for a school she is pursuing. Of course I was more than happy to oblige and flattered she would ask. She is bright, personable and motivated to make improvements in her career and has much potential. I wish her all the best. I have probably done the same for dozens of others as well. I have known so many that have gone on to pursue and attain their goals. Occasionally I'll bump into someone that I used to work with and the first thing they'll ask is "are you STILL there?... but you're SO talented". Will it ever be my time? I have worked in retail for most of my life. I have never considered it a career...ever. It has always been a vehicle; a means of taking care of my responsibilities so that I can pursue my dream. I have had countless opportunities for advancement that I have bypassed so my focus remains on my art. I'm certain that I'm perceived as one with little ambition. That couldn't be further from the truth. It is because of my ambition that I have never gone with the comfortable - the natural transition within my day job occupation. It never bothered me before. I knew what I was to become and there were better things on the horizon which I was working toward. I'm older now. I do my job well but it's simplistic and lacks challenge. It's ideal for one that is either working toward something else or lacks the drive to achieve better. It now embarrasses me. There was a time when my particular position was new to the company and I was able to create a dramatic increase in profits for them. They reflected this in my salary and bonuses and I became financially comfortable. The fire for my art was never extinguished but it was put on simmer. I'm grateful for that period of time. I wouldn't have been able to purchase my home without it; or so I thought at the time. Since then there have been many changes. My position is still necessary but no longer brings in revenue for the store and my compensation reflects that. With all the people that have come and gone I have never heard a tale of regret for having moved on. Ok, I've taken a dip in the pool of self-pity... now - time to dry off and focus on tossing the bouquet, not catching it! ( that's a metaphor, guys ) . Liz, don't forget to write.